Sep 3, 2008

FEMA for kidz rap... seriously



BEHOLD, THE FEMA FOR KIDZ RAP:

http://www.fema.gov/kids/femarap.htm

The stupidity of it all is seriously off the charts. Since Hurricane Katrina, FEMA's public opinion hasn't exactly been stellar. Of course, FEMA decides that the way to fix this is to create a rap song targeted at kids. I would have instead fired those responsible for the mishaps and beefed up it's ability to respond, but what the hell do I know.

It's a really, really bad rap song too. The lyrics of which are posted at the above link. Mitigation? What kid knows of that word? And how fugging depressing is it when the whole point of your song is (essentially) live in constant fear of natural disasters and oh, by the way, we're here to help.

And don't even get me started on the music. Don't bother downloading the song, it's just a drum loop from a cheap Casio electronic keyboard with the occasional ambient instrument while some uninterested guy talks over the lyrics. When I heard it, and after I ripped my ears off of my skull, I realized that Shatner could have done a better job of it all. Without music. And he wouldn't have made me hate FEMA as much in the process.

And how about the fact that it's encoded in Real Audio? So that you need to use RealPlayer to listen to it? 1995 was a long time ago, fellas. The quality on this this is horrible to boot. Kids are going to be turned off from this simply because it sounds like it was recorded underwater. The mental image I just got of the "singer" drowning while recording this song is eerily comforting.

And the site itself is offensive. That bright yellow background requires sunglasses to view pain-free. Was this site done by the same people who made Phillup Douchebag's D. Bag's website?

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